The following is a transcript for the episode "Short Cut".

Script

The quotations in the following transcript are owned by Viacom International Inc. (a wholly owned subsidiary of Paramount Skydance Corporation), and are an exception to The Loud House Encyclopedia's CC-BY-SA license. This transcript is provided in full as a source of review and reference, which likely falls under fair use under United States copyright law.

[At Margarita's Beauty, Margarita gets purple eyeshadow applied, and then Carlota adds some blush]
Carlota: "Let's highlight your eyes, bring out those cheekbones, a little shimmer, and… voila."
[Spins Margarita around towards the mirror, making her a little dizzy]
Margarita: "Wow, I look amazing."
Carlota: "Does that mean I pass my beauty test? Do I get my certificate?"
Margarita: "You aced the makeup portion, Chica. But you still need to pass the hair styling test. Can't wait to see what you do with this bird's nest tomorrow."
[Sancho sits in Margarita's hair, and gets kicked out by a mama bird protecting her babies]

[Back at the apartment, Carl is due for a haircut and Carlota is begging Carl to be her test subject]
Carlota: "Please let me cut your hair. If I don't get my certificate, I won't be able to work at that celebrity spa place this summer."
[Holds up a flyer for the spa. Alisa Barela is the poster girl]
Carl: "Oh, well in that case… no. I've got a hair guy."
Carlota: "Come on, I need you little bro."
Carl: "Enough to clean my room for a month?"
Carlota: "Two weeks."
Carl: "Three weeks! And do my homework for a month."
Carlota: "One week of cleaning, no homework, but I'll show you where Abuela hides her candy."
Carl: [Shakes] "Deal!" [Looks around and whispers] "Just don't tell my hair guy."
Carlota: [Escorts Carl to the bathroom] "Okay, we're just going to do a really simple cut."
[She takes her scissors out. A few snips and Carl screams, which can be heard outside the building. Carl runs into the other apartment, where Rosa, Carlos, Hector and Frida are, clutching his head, tears forming]
Carl: "Glue it back on! GLUE IT BACK ON!"
[Carl shows his new haircut; he's got Hector's hairstyle. Frida is horrified]
Hector: "Huh, you look like someone familiar, and guapo."
Carl: [Hugs his madre] "Mom! Carlota made me look like Abuelo!" [Shakes his fist at his hermana] "I'll never forgive you for this."
Carlota: "I'm sorry, I do my own hair every day and I look fabulous. So I just figured… Why would this be any different?"
Carl: "Well guess what… it IS different!"
Sergio: [With his camera. Squawks] "Making a new movie: Attack of the Bad Hairdresser. Whose hair will she butcher next?"
Bobby: [Comes up to Carl] "Hey, Abuelo, can I get off early today? I have a phone date with Lori."
[Carl is really mad now]
Hector: [Behind Bobby] "I'm over here, Bobby. And, no."
[Bobby looks at the two characters with the same hair and shrugs]
Bobby: "Okay, bye, two Abuelos."
[Bobby leaves and Carlota groans]
Carlota: "I ruined Carl's hair and I'm gonna fail my test tomorrow. I need someone else to practice on."
[Everyone who still has their hair flees]
Carl: "That's right! Save yourselves!"
[CJ innocently walks into the living room]
CJ: "Where'd everyone go?" [sees Carl with his haircut] "And what happened to you?!"
Carl: "Carlota happened! I'm ruined, CJ! You have to help me!"
CJ: "OK."
[He uses a clipper and restores Carl's hair to its former glory. Carl takes a look at himself in the mirror and sighs in relief.]
Carlota: "Wait, CJ's your hair guy?"
Carl: "He's a genius with clippers. I'll never cheat on you again."
[CJ blows the smoke from his clipper]
Carlota: "Wow, CJ. I wish I had your skill. I'm gonna fail my exam tomorrow. Can you give me some tips?"
CJ: "Sure. Tip number one: The Abuelo look is never in."
Carl: [humming to himself as he looks at his reflection] "Who has two thumbs and is muy guapo? This guy!" [laughs]

[Carlota and CJ are practicing hairstyling on a wig.]
CJ: "Remember, keep it simple. No big cuts." [Carlota shaves off a huge chunk of the wig] "It's OK." [It's revealed they've been doing this to countless wigs already.] "That was only your... 47th try."
Sergio: [squawks, is still filming] "The bad hairdresser strikes again. So many victims! Is no one safe?" [Carlota growls and throws a wig at Sergio] "Now she's got me!"
Carlota: "He's right. I can't do any of these styles! I'm gonna wreck Margarita's hair tomorrow!"
CJ: "Hmmm. Why don't you just learn how to do her style?" [alters the wig into Margarita's style]
Carlota: "You're right! If I just focus on getting her signature style down, maybe I'll be OK."

[A montage occurs. CJ preps a blond wig. Carlota styles it, but slices the mannequin head in half]
CJ: "Ooh. Let's try again." [Later, Carlota alters another wig into Margarita's style and gets it right] "Yes! You're getting it! Again."
Carlota: "We're out of wigs!" [holds an empty wig box]
[Later, Carlota has applied the finishing touches on something]
CJ: "You did it! So beautiful."
[It turns out she has given Lalo Margarita's hairstyle.]
Bobby: [walks by and notices Lalo with the hairstyle] "Oh. Hey, Margarita."
Carlota: "Yes!" [high-fives CJ]
[Just then, Lalo barks and pins Bobby down]
Bobby: "Bad Margarita! You know I already have a girlfriend!"
[Lalo licks him, barks and wags his tail.]

[The next day at Margarita's Beauty, Carlota arrives]
Carlota: "Hey Margarita, I'm here for my hair test. CJ came to cheer me on."
[CJ grabs a wig, puts some on it on his head and tears off two pieces for pom-poms]
CJ: [Playing cheerleader] "Go Carlota, cut that hair! Get the best cuts, anywhere!"
Margarita: [Sits] "Great, I'm so sick of this style. I need a fresh new look."
[CJ flips his wig]
Carlota: "What?! Uh... [Sweats and hesitates] But your do is a classic. And uh... you don't mess with a classic."
Margarita: "I'm over it. I want something completely different." [Takes out her phone] "Make me look like this."
[Shows an image of a woman with her hair down. Carlota gulps and goes to CJ]
Carlota: "We didn't prep for this. What if I chop her ear off?"
Margarita: [Having heard that] "Chop whose ear off?"
Carlota: [Sweats and hesitates] "Oh, uh, that's just an expression. It means make you look great."
Margarita: "Oh, how hip. Chop my ear off, Chica."
Carlota: [Nervously laughs] "Okay."
[Carlota brings the clippers close to Margarita's hair, she's super scared.]
CJ: [Comes up to Margarita with a blindfold] "Uh, Margarita, sit back, take a nap. You work too hard."
Margarita: [Takes the blindfold] "CJ, you don't know the half of it."
[Puts the blindfold on and gets snoring]
CJ: "Here, let me do it."
Carlota: [Gives him the clippers] "Thank you."
CJ: [Gets clipping] "Yeah!"
Carlota: "Okay, all done." [Margarita takes the mask off] "Tada."
Margarita: [Looks in the mirror] "Hmm, I… love it. Carlota, you're even better at hair than you are at makeup."
Carlota: "So does that mean I passed? Celebrity spa here I come!"
Margarita: "That's right, I have your certificate right here." [Offers it to her. Carlota is ecstatic, she reaches to grab it, when suddenly Margarita gets a phone call] "Just a second, Chica." [Answers the phone] "Hello?" [The person speaks] "Que!" [The person speaks again. Margarita holds the certificate in front of Carlota] "Chicken pox and the flu?! What? I didn't even know that could happen." [Carlota tries to grab her certificate, but Margarita's arm keeps moving] "No it's okay, I'll be fine." [Margarita hangs up the phone and starts crying] "My assistant is sick. We're styling a whole bridal party tomorrow. I don't know how I'll do it alone." [Confronts her, causing her to sweat] "You have to help me."
Carlota: "Me? No, I… I cou…"
Margarita: "Please? It's a hair emergency and you have your certificate." [Gives it to her] "So it's official, you can help me."
Carlota: "Uh, how could I say no?"
Margarita: [Hugs Carlota] "Gracias! Gracias! Gracias!" [Leaves] "I'll see you tomorrow."
Carlota: [To CJ] "I hate to ask."
CJ: "Don't worry, I got this."
[Just then Vito walks in]
Vito: "Hey, chop my ear off. I hear that's what all the kids are saying."

[The next day, Vito is rocking Beethoven's coif as CJ and Carlota enter the salon where the bride and her very testy father are speaking with Margarita]
Bride's Father: "No, you don't understand. It's the most important day of my daughter's life. So I have to look fantastic!"
[Smiles, his teeth a glitter]
Carlota: "Oh, it's just the two of them. This won't be so bad." [Just then the very giggly and very long haired bridesmaids enter. Carlota gulps] "Or not."
Margarita: "Ah, thank goodness you're here. The father of the bride is going to be a handful."
Bride's Father: [off-screen] "My hair's not getting any shorter."
Margarita: "I'll deal with him and the bride. Can you start on that mountain of hair over there?"
[Points at the bridesmaids]
Carlota: [Sweats and gives a thumb up.] "You got it."
[Margarita escorts the bride and her father to the other room]
Margarita: "Right this way please."
[Gives Carlota a thumbs up]
Carlota: [To CJ] "At least she'll be distracted for a while."
[CJ agrees]
CJ: [To the bridesmaids] "Okay, let's start with a face mask."
[Later all the bridesmaids are wearing facemasks and cucumber slices over their eyes]
Carlota: "Good idea with the cucumbers." [CJ gets trimming, spraying, and combing] "Okay, cucumbers off." [The bridesmaids oblige and all look great] "We did it. Margarita's doing the bride, so we're in the clear."
[Just then Margarita taps Carlota's shoulder]
Margarita: [Slightly annoyed] "Dadzilla over here keeps changing his mind about his hairstyle. I need you to handle the bride, okay?"
Carlota: "Oh, I…"
Bride's Father: "Margarita! How am I supposed to walk down the aisle like this?"
[His hair is super shiny]
Margarita: "What do you mean? You look amazing."
Bride's Father: "Exactly! I can't upstage my daughter!"
[Margarita moans and goes to make him slightly less attractive]
Bridesmaid: "We can't wait to see what you do with her gorgeous hair."
[The bride walks out and lets her hair down. She's beautiful. Carlota is nervous, and Sergio appears, camera at the ready]
Sergio: "Me too."
Carlota: "What are you doing here?"
Sergio: "Need an end to my hairdresser horror movie."
Bridesmaids: "Whoa." "Uh, what the what now?"
Sergio: "I mean… I'm the wedding videographer." [Awkwardly laughs, and the girls buy it and go giggly again] "Lights, camera… Nightmare! I mean… Action!"
Carlota: [To CJ] "Help."
CJ: "Uh…" [Looks at the wall and goes to the light switch] "Hey Carlota, don't you work best with the lights off?"
Carlota: "I do? [Confidently] I mean I do. It's all about feeling the hair."
Bride: "O...kay, everyone else's hair looks great, so I trust you."
Carlota: [To CJ] "Are you sure about this?"
CJ: "No."
[CJ gets the lights , a few clips later and the bride looks amazing]
Bride's Father: "Ooh, it's perfect!" [Starts tearing up] "I promised myself I wouldn't cryyyy..."
[Does so anyway. Margarita comforts him]
Carlota: "Wow CJ, you're amazing."
Bride: "It's beautiful. I'm just sad it won't be on the wedding video."
Sergio: [Squawks] "Yes it will, my camera's got night vision."
[Everyone gasps]
Carlota: "Sergio, no!"
[Sergio plugs in the camera, revealing that CJ cut the bride's hair. Everyone gasps]
Bride's Father: "Say what?"
Sergio: "Now that's a twist ending."
Margarita: "I don't understand… CJ cut the bride's hair?"
Carlota: [Sighs] "He cut everyone's hair, including yours."
Margarita: "What?"
Carlota: "I practiced and practiced, but I couldn't get it right. So... I roped CJ into helping me. He's an absolute hair wizard, even in the dark." [CJ laughs] "Anyway, I'm so sorry for lying to you."
Margarita: "I wish you hadn't, I would have given you more time. You don't have to be good at everything right away, Mi'jita."
Carlota: "Yeah, you're right. I really messed up. I obviously don't deserve this certificate."
[Gives it back]
Margarita: "Well, not yet, you don't, but I think I have an idea."
Carlota and CJ: "Huh?"

[The next day, CJ gives another man a haircut while Carlota holds a broom]
CJ: "See how I use the clippers for the sides? Much easier."
Carlota: "So smart."
CJ: "All done."
[The man leaves and Margarita walks up to them]
Margarita: "A few more weeks of on-the-job training with my favorite new stylist, and you should be ready to get that certificate."
[Carl walks in]
Carl: "V.I.H coming through. That's uh Very Important Hair." [Walks into the chair and chuckles] "Make way for your number one client."
CJ: "Ready to give it a try?"
[Offers Carlota the clippers. Carl sees Carlota about to trim his hair again. Wanting to keep his hair, he runs out the building covering it with his arms.]
Carl: "Changed my mind! I'm growing it out." [Laughs] "Bye."